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Love me, leave me
Devour me, deceive me
Is that the way that this is going to be
Between you and me? You say you want me, I’m sure that’s true
But how long will it be until you’re through?
There’s something I don’t trust in your eyes
You speak to me with sugar coated lies…

- Love me, leave me – Bitstream Dream with Anji Bee

Amazing how some lyrics just seem to tell the story of your life.

Listening to this song… I can’t help but look back over the last few years at some of the words that have been spoken to me by people I cared for. And how empty those same words appear now from those who supposedly returned those feelings…

I’ve never had much success, romantically. But I’ve always been honest, if not bluntly so, with the people I care for. Sometimes wish they would offer me that same courtesy instead of sugar-coating empty words of deceit in what I am later told was said or done in order to not hurt my feelings.

I’ve often said to people, I do not like the games we play with eachother in modern society. I’m not willing to subject myself to them. And if that means I exclude myself from society in general because of that, so be it. Rather a free-thinking outsider, than a pawn in someone else’s game.

I take things as they come now. And I’ll give 100% and more to the person that accepts me for who I am, and not for what I have, what I can offer, what I do or who I know.

And I should really change the music I listen to…